FEAR It is what keeps most artists, dancers, performers, from taking the first step.  The feelings of "I am not good enough, educated enough, pretty enough, enough……ENOUGH!!
As a child I sought adventure until I reached the age where the arrows pointed to insecurity, you are too short, too fat, too thin, it is then that the creative self goes into hiding.  It took a long time to find that being creative was not a waste of time.  After I raised three children, (my first-- "beautiful Helene"......then the"handsome and wise old soul "Buz" Myles..... and finally after 14 years "the giver of life Viva," whose father Jerry will be in my life until time is just a memory. And to my grandchildren Sarah, Joshua and Isabella Marie who keep me laughing so the people in the white coats don't come to get me.

 After some time,  I decided to take up a hobby,  to play the guitar, a hobby I loved and it helped me to take a break from many problems.   I started  out by playing folk music which I continue to love.  I started to work with my brother ARTHUR and  we did gigs mostly for the family and performances in schools and coffee houses. Arthur went off to college and the music bug was still yearning in me.  Time passed and then I met a crazy man I should say (borderline) who wrote songs and we formed a duo called Punch and Judy. We peddled the songs to all the big record labels until one famous company Mercury Records decided to record us.  It was a 45’ with original songs called "Time for a Change" and "Catch a Rainbow".  The dream was just taking off when my partner went berserk and started to act weird, which happens a lot in this business.  Groups have personality differences and arguments which sparked separation, "my song's better than yours" "you have a lousy voice," "you can't harmonize, and the whole picture of money, fame, contracts, went down the drain. The record companies would not put up with it.  Again, FEAR set in and even though my agents promised to book me as a single act, I felt that I could no longer play the game of R&R men, producers, drugs and suffering and of course did not feel good enough by myself.

 I am not sure when I decided to paint.    I guess it was about 5 years ago and used pencils (watercolor), which seemed to be the easiest way to carry my books and materials with me.  A friend of mine, my mentor, Margaret Rothschild, suggested that I try to use acrylic paints and allow my feelings to come onto the paper. Suddenly I found that the color inspired me to create forms which surprised me when these forms developed into a piece of abstract art.  I continued to paint many pieces and some I just hid under my bed.  Very rarely did I throw anything out.  Sometimes I would look at a piece I did a few years ago and decided I liked it.  If I didn't like it, I painted over it which gave me more materials to work with.. At the time I started to paint, I had a full time job and painting was more of a hobby.  It was relaxing and enjoyable.  My biggest fan at work was Marvin Washington, a counselor who loved my art and called me his #1 artist.

What I believe, as far as abstract art is concerned is that when children are presented with an art project, putting paper and paint in front of them, they paint what they feel.  Of course the visual images they see play an important part of creating a piece of art, but I think the feeling is so powerful, that  it  outweighs the visual images.  In my case, since I had no formal training, and I never had an interest in drawing scenery, a tree, an apple or otherwise.  I just started to use the materials I had (after using the watercolor pencils) I used acrylic paint in various colors, brushes, a roller and some odd objects including a large dog bone (suggested by Margaret) which became  another tool for patterns I created by painting gold acrylic paint on the outside area of the bone and stamping the paper or canvas. Throughout my life I have painted, but have never taken it seriously.  The real gift came to me five years ago when chaos from overwhelming responsibilities stopped me in my tracks.  I found solace in paper and paint and it helped to clear the emotional blocks which were preventing me from being creative.   Color, intuition and the wonders of nature gave my mind a well-deserved vacation. In painting abstract art, I have come to the conclusion that it is not about understanding what the artist means, so much as the communication it presents to the person who views the art and what it touches in them.  I consider art an extension of my spiritual beliefs.